Constructive Criticism or Projected Self-Doubt? How you should handle less than enthused spectators while you're minding your business...

Just going to be quite frank, if i may. Not everyone is going to be happy with you when you're on the come up. Inevitably, people you used to hang around will fall off. If they're real friends or genuinely care about you, they will come back around eventually. Let them leave. When you're doing what you have decided to do... Maybe you left your job and started your own thing, or you got out of a shitty relationship or even something less life changing happened to you like ya changed the color of your hair, some of the folks in your circle may seem to go ghost on you. From their perspective, you are no longer the person they are used to (or comfortable) with. And when you consistently keep climbing over those mountains that used to be in your way, you may be forcing them to evaluate and self-analyze why they haven't done those things in their own life. They may not be ready to accompany you on your journey and that is fine. They don't have to. They shouldn't feel bad about it and neither should you.

Nobody enjoys feeling left out or left behind. But it happens. So find a way to include people you care about in sharing your excitement. If they really aren't interested in what you're doing, maybe find some other things to bond together on. You may be talking them to death about whatever it is you have going on and they are simply tired of hearing about it. Stop bragging, even if it's humble bragging.

You don't necessarily have to censor yourself when you're excited but just be aware and consider when it may not be the right time to share your big announcements. For example: when your friend is over for dinner and they're telling you how crappy their week has been and you immediately respond with "Yea that sucks but this week has been awesome for me, too bad for you." That may not be exactly what you would say, but everything sounds precisely like that to the person whom life has been unapologetically serving lemons to.

When you have people around who are only half supporting you. They're rooting for you but not really. They will have an encyclopedia of every single thing you are doing WRONG. They will reference every page and none of it is backed by facts. Only their personal opinions. They may even offer suggestions and what they believe is constructive criticism, usually when it is not asked for. Don't dismiss it, just because of who it is coming from. There's often truth buried in there somewhere. However, you should recognize when the negative commentary is only the commentators own self-doubts being projected on to you.

It's much more subtle than "You shouldn't because I can't." Although, that is the general tone. Like I mentioned above, sometimes it is YOU, oh dear one. You are being considerably over the top about your new found happiness... But that's something YOU can manage. You can't unfortunately control others perceptions or reaction to what is going on with you. The only real thing you can do is create space between you and the offended party. Hopefully a happy, welcoming space is what manifests but sometimes it has to be an actual, measurable distance until life restores balance again.

Overall, you're in charge of your own well-being. Check and manage YOUR ego before you worry about whether or not people are hatin' on you or are being debby downers or trying to throw salt in your game. Maybe you're just projecting your own self-doubt and feelings of low self-worth onto the people around you..... Ever think about that?